Loving the view outside my window♥

Loving the view outside my window♥

Sunday, March 28, 2010

I Want to Stay ♥

So as I was making my way home this evening the song by Sugarland called "Stay" came on the radio. As I listened to the lyrics I began to realize that the words she was singing are words that I'm sure my Heavenly Father whispers to me whenever I manage to steer off course....

Many times I find myself straying from the One who loves me more than anyone else, and somehow I forget that He is All I will ever need. How is it then, that I try to split myself between loving him and loving men and the things of this world? He has done nothing to deserve second place and everything to deserve first place fully and completely. There's a saying that says, "A woman's heart should be so lost in God that a man must seek Him in order to find her." I, in my life, wish to get to that place.

The following is an edited version of the song from, I believe, God's perspective.

[God:] I've been sitting here staring at the clock on the wall...And I've been standing here watching, praying he won't call. It's just another call from him [just one more distraction from me], and you'll get it and be gone and I'll be crying. And I'll be begging you, Karyn, begging you not to leave, but I'll be left here waiting with my heart on my sleeve. Oh, for the next time we'll be here seems like a million years [though I'm the one who died for you]. What do I have to do to make you see that [he and all those other things that take my place] can't love you like me? Why don't you stay?
[Me:] I'm down on my knees--I'm so tired of being lonely,
[God:] don't I give you what you need? When [the things of this world call you to go, there is one thing you should know: [You] don't have to live this way, baby--why don't you stay? You keep telling me, baby there will come a time when you will leave [those things behind] and forever be mine. But [is that really] the truth? And I don't like being used and [though I'll wait forever, I am weary] It's [so] much pain to have to bear to love [someone] you have to share.
[Me:] I can't take it any longer [, this runabout I put You through]. My will is getting stronger, and I think I know just what I have to do. I can't waste another minute after all that [You've]  put in it. [You've] given [me your life, and all the best of you, why does [this world] get the best of [me]?
So next time [I want to leave your arms to make my own way, I'm gonna stay. I'm down on my knees. I'm so tired of being lonely, and you're the only one that can give me what I need. This world begs me not to go, but Lord, there's one thing you should know, I'm tired of living my life this way. I want to stay.]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPG1n1B0Ydw

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Pulling the Trigger on Gender Roles

 Set somewhere around the 1940s, when women’s rights was on the rise, stands this photo with as much mystery as there is boldness. Based on the views and different things seen in present day society, it is almost impossible to believe that there was a time where women were unable to voice their opinions or hold positions equal to men. The lady pictured here, however, seems to be defying many of those cultural norms leading up to her time. Guns, which were dominantly thought of as an instrument used by men, were not the primary ornament of a lady. Even in present-day society, girls with guns are generally considered mannish or “butch”, and hardly lady-like or proper. I assume that is the very reason why the woman looks as uncomfortable as she does. The photo speaks of the changing roles for men and women in the time period surrounding the 1940s, or rather the conglomeration of men’s and women’s roles being applied to women due to the oncoming war. During the war, many women took on jobs that required the assembly of firearms, etc., forcing the social norms to be altered in order to accommodate the need for workers.
The woman in the photo emits mixed signals. Yes, at first glance the photo seems very relaxed and casual, but look further and you see that her jaw is set, legs and spine rigid: not at all nonchalant like the two gentlemen in the photo—a sign that she is uncomfortable with the image that she is portraying whether she desires to be portraying it or not. During times of change it is difficult to decide whether to stick to residual beliefs or succumb to the new beliefs that are climbing the ladder in society.
          The men, on the other hand, seem to be posing in a manner typical to all generations in their situation. Most men tend to become excited at the sight of a woman with a gun in her hands. Although I am unsure of the exact reason why this occurs, I am aware that most men act accordingly. Perhaps the reason lies within the fact that women are stereotypically defined as meek and subservient, while a woman carrying a gun, or performing any other masculine duty, is behaving outside the lines of social norms. Is it that men enjoy seeing a woman show her strength in various ways? Perhaps that will be a question that remains unanswered. Regardless, in this particular photo, two men are present—dangling at the sides of the rigid woman holding the gun, almost as though the gender roles have been switched. Usually, it is the female that you find clinging to the arm of her man with head on shoulder, or just behaving as though she needs him for support. Here, however, we see a “lady” in the center, with two men “clinging” to (or supporting) her.  No longer is the woman an ornament of the man, but the men have become the ornamental bookends of the female huntress.
          One intriguing observation to be made is the fact that, though standing seemingly at the edge of a field with gun in hand, all three musketeers are dressed as though they’re on their way to work or somewhere fancy. Never in my years have I seen a woman head out to hunt or shoot something wearing a blazer, skirt, and heels. Once, I had a friend stop her truck on the way home from church and go shoot a deer in her dress, but generally one does not prepare for such an event planning to wear a dress and heels. Men also have ceased to dress up for outdoor activities. Cabela’s would go out of business if men decided that suits worked just as well as their camouflage and orange. Not only do they bother with the clothing these days, but intense hunters must have a certain scent and all the right little gadgets that go along with the hobby. With that said, I can deduct that dressing fancy for a hunting/shooting excursion is now an extremely archaic practice that, I’m sure, most people would laugh to discover.
          The mystery that is so captivating in this photo is the look on the woman’s face. Defiance, fear, intensity, apprehension, determination—these are all words that run through my mind, but which is the true meaning of her stern expression? I know I’ve seen that look on the faces of women who are being mocked by men because of their supposed inequality in some field dominantly conquered by men. I have also noticed that, ironically enough, when a woman succeeds in that area despite pressures from social norms and expectations, however, men usually are the ones with the sheepish grins on their faces. Because of these expectations, I find that we as women tend to shy away from going after many of the things that we desire, whether they are set goals or jobs or whatever else. I suppose defiance, fearful apprehension, and intense determination are all things that could be read in the lady’s expression based on the pressures that she most likely felt which women continue to be bombarded with in the present.
          What is the main issue presented in this photo, or any other photo? I believe that the main issue is image. All photos ask these questions, “Who are we?” “With whom do we associate ourselves?” “How does our appearance affect the way we are viewed as individuals?”, and this photo is no different. Stance, posture, facial expressions, dress, and arrangement—these all welcome the viewer to examine and scrutinize those questions and form a personal opinion about the subjects therein.  At one point in the essay, “The Art of the American Snapshot”, the thought is stated that during this time period there was a great search for the “ideal image”.  As people became more aware of themselves and more timid of being out in public without the proper attire, the values of society changed considerably. Instead of not bothering as much with appearance when going out, say, to shoot some game, people began dressing their best even more than usual because of their awareness of the paparazzi.  With a fresh perception of the possibility of random snapshots being taken, individuals had to take much more care not only in what they wore, but how they walked and how they maintained their overall demeanor.
          A great example of how people wish to be represented in a particular way is scrapbooking. As Jessica Helfand mentioned in her essay, “What We Save”, scrapbooks are often discovered by others who have no previous knowledge of the individuals that coordinated them. Therefore, image and the proper portrayal of factual qualities are of high importance. Scrapbooks are made of pictures, correct? Assuming that that is correct, the pictures must entail a thought and planning, especially coming from the 1940s-1950s era. However, no matter how much one plans for a photo, emotions and insecurities always seem to show themselves. For example, the woman in the photograph appears to be strong, intense, unwavering; but as she is further examined, her look of slight fear and intimidation shows.  Bottom line: women are, by definition, the submissive creatures intended to support the man, and this photo captures (willingly or unwillingly) the subjects’ thoughts upon the matter. Whether a photo finds itself lost in the pages of a scrapbook fifty years later or wears it’s colors (or lack thereof) proudly on display, it screams about the situations, emotions, and relationships present  within itself.

Monday, March 8, 2010

The Curse of Ornamental Relationships


Universally, beauty is appreciated as a gift from God, something that, if not present, is considered a curse. Well, I believe this to be untrue. Sure, I can appreciate beautiful things, beautiful people, beautiful whatevers....However, when it comes to relationships and finding a base thereof, I deem beauty a curse. Why is it that whenever we search for that perfect mate we automatically judge the prospects by their immediate appearance? Well, I know, but I think it's wrong.

Beauty is so much deeper than the epidermis. For example, the Proverbs 31 woman:
  • Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
  • The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. 
  • She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
  • She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
  • She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
  • She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
  • She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. 
  • She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
  • She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
  • She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
  • She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
  • She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
  • She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
  • Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
  • She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. 
  • Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. 
  • She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is tha law of kindness. 
  • She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
  • Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
  • Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
  • Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.
  • Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates 
 Now that.....is beautiful. I think the issue that I have with society today is that, while many women strive to be as much like this perfect image portrayed in the Bible, most men (or, guys), fail to acknowledge that beauty. Instead, they take the female at face value, appreciating only the outer beauty and using their girl as an ornament for their egos. It is not feministic to desire to be seen beyond one's skin, it is only natural. A woman desires to feel needed, appreciated, and yes, beautiful....but above all there is a desire to know that her inner attributes are special, desired, sought after over and above the beauty that is imposed upon our minds as a must-have by present-day society.
I am exhausted by the pressures of this world to fill a mold that is not of God. He calls not for us women to be idols, ornaments, and favorite pastimes, He calls for us to be holy, pure, acceptable in His sight, apart from what is popular in today's culture. We are instructed in His word so set Him as a seal upon our hearts---He does "own" our hearts doesn't he? In that light, I can only assume that my heart should long for what would please him, not the sex-crazed society I am surrounded by.

Let us love the one who has paid the ultimate price in love for us....Let us offer ourselves at His feet and wash His feet with our hair. In light of eternity, His love is the only one that lasts, and His courtship will be the only one still bearing fruit after this earthly body (beautiful or otherwise) is returned to dust. I don't know about you, but my soul longs for the caress of my Savior, and the sweet embrace of His everlasting mercy and love. ♥♥♥

Do his eyes twinkle when he thinks of you, his precious child...or do they fill with tears at the sight of you giving yourself away to another idol rather than Him and His perfect plan?

The pleasure of sin lasts for only a little while...then vanishes away...but the treasures we lay up in heaven last for an eternity...and they don't make our Heavenly Father cry ♥